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| Charting euphoria |
If I must be honest, when I first
heard of this concept at a cultural training seminar I was fairly skeptical.
The skepticism stood fast since I hardly went through such a curve when I moved
to the US from India. And secondly, I strive to be non-average in such a
vigorous fashion that I, by default, show contempt for all stereotypical
theories.
heard of this concept at a cultural training seminar I was fairly skeptical.
The skepticism stood fast since I hardly went through such a curve when I moved
to the US from India. And secondly, I strive to be non-average in such a
vigorous fashion that I, by default, show contempt for all stereotypical
theories.
However, shedding the cloak of
average-ness needs more than just self-belief. And so, after almost five months in Germany I feel
like that I have traversed the exact curve that my instructor had once
mentioned in a class not so long ago in Michigan.
average-ness needs more than just self-belief. And so, after almost five months in Germany I feel
like that I have traversed the exact curve that my instructor had once
mentioned in a class not so long ago in Michigan.
Not so long ago, I was a master
of my environment in Ann Arbor Michigan. I knew where most things were
available and if not, I knew exactly who to ask. In fact, I even spoke the
language that made getting information and help fairly easy. I was cruising
along nicely. It was exactly this unsatisfying comfort that made me want to
shake things and come here.
of my environment in Ann Arbor Michigan. I knew where most things were
available and if not, I knew exactly who to ask. In fact, I even spoke the
language that made getting information and help fairly easy. I was cruising
along nicely. It was exactly this unsatisfying comfort that made me want to
shake things and come here.
Here though, the picture was completely
rattled. As soon as I knew what I needed, I had to figure out where to get it.
Even if I managed to find the right store, getting the right product would
involve not only multiple trips but sometimes the bonus of looking like an
idiot. With my crude German speaking attempts I managed to get a lot done. But the
result was always exhaustion and a slight sense of defeat. Like a kid who just doesn’t
know how to behave in an adult world.
rattled. As soon as I knew what I needed, I had to figure out where to get it.
Even if I managed to find the right store, getting the right product would
involve not only multiple trips but sometimes the bonus of looking like an
idiot. With my crude German speaking attempts I managed to get a lot done. But the
result was always exhaustion and a slight sense of defeat. Like a kid who just doesn’t
know how to behave in an adult world.
The euphoria that came with newness
of Germany is now being dampened by the strangeness of her surroundings, her
people and their behavior. I am interpreting the same events but with changed
connotations. The bureaucracy of the
Local city government has certainly left a bitter taste in certain matters.
Perhaps what made it worse is that I hadn’t expected a cultural shock of any
kind. After all I had visited this land several times, lived her for three
months before and considered it to be a similarly developed Western economy.
of Germany is now being dampened by the strangeness of her surroundings, her
people and their behavior. I am interpreting the same events but with changed
connotations. The bureaucracy of the
Local city government has certainly left a bitter taste in certain matters.
Perhaps what made it worse is that I hadn’t expected a cultural shock of any
kind. After all I had visited this land several times, lived her for three
months before and considered it to be a similarly developed Western economy.
Now, I find myself at a point on
the curve where I must tread carefully. What I haven’t realized though is that
I have already made the decision to rise upwards.
the curve where I must tread carefully. What I haven’t realized though is that
I have already made the decision to rise upwards.
While my German is basic at best,
I have already started to blabber German words when I speak English. Occasionally my sentence structure in English has
a vague resemblance to the strict German code. Besides the language, I have
embraced my diesel Baby. I find in her the sensibility I seek but also the
occasional flashes of rear axle instability. I am meeting fascinating new
people here with delicious backgrounds. A German film maker who occasionally
shoots gorgeous Porsche’s; An American who is much better off being European; An
Italian math professor and his food photographer wife…
I have already started to blabber German words when I speak English. Occasionally my sentence structure in English has
a vague resemblance to the strict German code. Besides the language, I have
embraced my diesel Baby. I find in her the sensibility I seek but also the
occasional flashes of rear axle instability. I am meeting fascinating new
people here with delicious backgrounds. A German film maker who occasionally
shoots gorgeous Porsche’s; An American who is much better off being European; An
Italian math professor and his food photographer wife…
Looking back at my travels in the
last few months, I have already let my senses feast on the unknown and the read
known. I ran through French forests,
ruined castles and ancient cities. I made new friends over delicious German
beer even if it involved me wearing a traditional German outfit.
last few months, I have already let my senses feast on the unknown and the read
known. I ran through French forests,
ruined castles and ancient cities. I made new friends over delicious German
beer even if it involved me wearing a traditional German outfit.
What can be said about a decision
to move that sometimes makes you reconsider and other times excites you madly. It
might indeed end up being a sinusoidal wave of sorts but I would be damned if I
didn’t make sure that the integral sum of Germany isn’t positive.
to move that sometimes makes you reconsider and other times excites you madly. It
might indeed end up being a sinusoidal wave of sorts but I would be damned if I
didn’t make sure that the integral sum of Germany isn’t positive.
I seek my own contradictions and
my new juxtapositions here. I am convinced that the future will bring more
richness of experiences, both good and bad. And when compared to the steady
state comfortable ennui that I left behind, it appears ‘almost’ euphoric at
times.
my new juxtapositions here. I am convinced that the future will bring more
richness of experiences, both good and bad. And when compared to the steady
state comfortable ennui that I left behind, it appears ‘almost’ euphoric at
times.
I think most people get older purely because they no longer experience the wonder of discovering something new or unique every day. You get to do that, and that's so refreshing. The integral sum is a positive already!
D! How articulate.. I would feel the same way (I think).. I did struggle with this a lot, although I didn't live in Germany long term.. 'Sprechen sie englisch?'. Totally get it.
That being said, sometimes it is a battle against yourself. I did have days when I felt terribly alone and others when I didn't. I did keep reminding myself that I was picked for an opportunity because somebody had a quiet confidence that I was capable of doing well and that kept me motivated – more than I thought it would…
Being vegetarian didn't help my cause and I slowly but enthusiastically started moving over to the 'dark side'. Pros & cons I guess.
I hope this post is one of those pensive weekends for you and that you'll snap out of it. I am certian the integral sum of Germany will be positive for you, just knowing that you have a great attitude..
Take care and may the best come to you..
Ups: 🙂 Glad you see it that way too!
Jas: Thanks! yeah, this post was largely triggered by the German local govt idiosyncrasies but to be fair which govt doesn't have those 🙂